I’ve been wanting to post this for 4 days now but I’m still in a little shock actually.
Truth:
Remember how I had a great time on Saturday joining that local running group for a trail run? Well about a mile into the run I rolled my left ankle outward (yes, the same one that kept me from running for almost 4 months earlier this year….the same one that was feeling 100% (finally) after months of physical therapy and missed races and cross-training).
Dramatic version:
It was probably a rock or a tree root under a bunch of leaves. I thought I caught myself and pulled my ankle back before any injury happened. I was actually saying in my head “whew! that was close”.
Nothing bothered me for the rest of the day. Ironically even my sore knee was feeling good. Sunday though I noticed I felt sore. And by Sunday evening I realized I was limping! And to add insult to injury my knee was super irritated too. The entire peroneal tendon/muscle hurts (from ankle bone to just below the knee on the outside of my leg) but the ache is concentrated to about 3″ above my ankle bone on the outside of my leg. I’m SO angry with myself for allowing this to happen. But I’m even more frustrated with my body for failing me time and time again. I just want to live a life filled with fun, active things but I keep getting hurt. Yes, I’m guilty of not having the diligence to stick with strength training but really?! This is now the 3rd time this punk ankle has taken me down.
Reality:
I’m actually embarrassed for being so bent out of shape over this when my friend’s mom is dying of cancer and another friend’s mom is fighting normal daily living tasks because she has ALS. This is not a life threatening issue but yet I will be honest and tell you I have been consumed with sadness, frustration, depression but mostly fear by this injury and how it will most likely force me to bail on a 5k this Saturday and possibly a hike my boyfriend wanted me to join him for on Sunday.
I’m trying not to get ahead of myself and only concerning myself with doing what I know will help me heal. Icing, rest, compression, elevation and avoiding being on my feet too long. I also have a bottle of Chardonnay that I’m going to drink (for medicinal purposes of course).
If I am still injured in 2 weeks and miss the race I have scheduled for 12/13 I will basically lose my guaranteed entry for the 2015 NYC Marathon that I’ve worked pretty damn hard this year to secure amidst injury and missing races. So no, I won’t die if this happens but I’ll be pretty sad.
And if this becomes another prolonged 4 months of healing kind of injury I can only think my beloved NJ Marathon 4/26 might not happen. OK, OK, I said I wasn’t going to get ahead of myself.
Reality is I’ll live….but until I know more I’m just gonna have to work through this pity party because honestly it’s not flattering and it’s not productive. I’ll keep you posted.
If you haven’t been reading this little blog for long here are a few links around my previous injury…
when I first realized something wasn’t right
Finally going to the foot doctor
Finding out the doc wanted me to refrain from running longer
The reason I share this type of post is twofold: for one I need to vent and it’s cathartic for me to get my feelings down. But the more important reason is that I know injuries plague so many of us and I’m sure some of you can resonate. So consider this a virtual support group. And please do share your injury stories with me in the comments.
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